


Fist Fight

by Brynn_Jones



Category: Nero Wolfe - Rex Stout
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Guns, physical violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-02
Updated: 2017-02-02
Packaged: 2018-09-21 14:32:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9552905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Brynn_Jones/pseuds/Brynn_Jones
Summary: Archie and Saul get into a precarious situation in a dark alley, cornered by three armed thugs.





	

"And this one?" asked Saul pointing at yet another orchid.

I shrugged, already annoyed. We had been playing this game for half an hour already and I was getting tired. Saul would point at one of the orchids stacked on a rusty trolley next to us and ask me to name it. If I did, he’d give me a cent, if I didn't, I'd give him two. I had fifty cents in my pocket already, while Saul had just two. But that didn't seem to dampen his mood. In fact, he looked like a five-year-old in a toy store. He certainly didn't look like one of the best detectives in New York, which he was.

We were standing in front of an old orchid store, our eyes trained at the gun shop across the street. Well, not exactly at the gun shop, since it was hidden in the basement under a derelict Berner's Pharmacy, but at the side entrance leading to it. For the two hours we had been standing here, no one came in or out. We were bored stiff, which was probably the reason why Saul had suggested this ludicrous game.

He poked me in the ribs. "Come on, Archie. Name it."

I sighed and took a good look at the plant he was currently pointing at. It had a pink blossom with little white dots. By the looks of it, it was another Phalaenopsis - possibly a hybrid. And that's what I told Saul.

My friend frowned and looked at the tag attached to his plant. "That's the thirty-first Phalaenopsis they have in here. You're correct again."

I smiled. "It's the cheapest kind, what did you expect?"

He was now pouting like a little boy as handed me another cent. "I wanted to buy cigarettes today."

I rolled my eyes. "In that case, let's play some more. The things you smoke are disgusting."

He went to reply something, but stopped even before the first words left his mouth. I looked over my shoulder to see what disturbed him and smirked. There was a man knocking at the side entrance of the Pharmacy.

"What do we do now?" asked Saul his eyes never leaving the man.

"We'll wait for him to come back out, I don't want to fight anyone in a gun shop."

Saul nodded.

It took only something over ten minutes for the man to emerge again and head south. Saul and I were right behind him. We walked for five minutes and about twenty seconds, when we stopped in a dark alley between East 21st and 22nd Street, where our man met up with three others. They all looked terrible - they were all tattoos and muscles and looked like former professional boxers. That wasn't exactly good news, if we were to get into a fist fight, we would have a very hard time dealing with them.

They seemed to be arguing about something, so we didn't intervene - there _were_ guns involved after all. After few minutes, our man started yelling. I didn't hear exactly what he was saying, but I caught the word 'smuggle' amongst his tirade. That's what we were suspecting anyway, but it was nice to have your theories confirmed.

"He's coming towards us," whispered Saul into my ear as one of the boxers headed towards 21st Street. I nodded and shoved my friend behind some cardboard boxes. We watched the mountain of flesh flag a cab and drive away. One less person to worry about.

As we were crouching behind those boxes, I felt something brush against my leg - probably a mouse or a rat. Saul must've felt it too, because he jerked away knocking some of the cardboard as he did so.

"Who's there?" shouted one of the men in the alley.

"Get out," I hissed at Saul, "you’re dressed for the part."

He understood immediately what I meant, scrambling out of our hideaway. "What?" he shouted, slurring a little bit, playing the part of a homeless drunkard perfectly. Something I wouldn’t have been able to do in my pinstripe three-piece suit and wingtip shoes.

"Who are you?" came a threatening question from the dark alley.

Saul stumbled over to them. "What're ya doin' here? Tis' ma place. I liv' here."

One of the gorillas got hold of his shoulders and swung him to the ground. I could see Saul tense up a little bit, but he didn’t break character. "I liv' here," he repeated.

"None of your business what we’re doing here," said the other brute, his bald head glistening with sweat.

"Just deal with him, John. He's just a vagabond," snarled our man.

John – the boxer who still had hair on his head – turned around. "And what do you want me to do? Shoot him?"

I saw it coming before it even happened. Saul leaned back a little bit and by the time his fist landed on the back of the gorilla's head, I had my gun already drawn out and was on my way towards the little group.

The bald one grunted and pulled out his own gun and so did our man. Meanwhile, John was lying on the ground, hopefully unconscious, with Saul towering over him.

"Who are you?" squeaked our man looking from me to Saul and back again.

I kept my voice down. "I'll tell you if you put that thing down."

Our man shuddered, though it was probably more because of the cold of the evening rather than my threatening attitude, since it didn't look as if he intended to do as I asked.

I looked at Saul briefly, checking that his gun was in his hand and aimed as well. I didn't doubt he knew where to shoot in this situation. As I looked back at my target, I nodded and fired, hearing an echoing shot come from Saul’s revolver. Both of our opponents were disarmed immediately, their hands bleeding.

"You son of the bitch!" shouted the bald-head and leapt at me. I ducked easily and threw my gun far away from his reach. It would be of no use to me since I didn't want shoot him, while he would have no qualms shooting me and I didn't want to give him the opportunity. From the corner of my eye, I saw Saul do the same with his gun as he blocked out some of our man’s attempts to punch him.

I wanted to remark something about Saul having it easier, but was unable to do so as my man swiped a clenched fist at my face. I dodged around it and closed the distance between us. Startled, he took a step back just as I threw my open palm to his solar plexus. He bent over in pain, but didn't take long to recover. Still hunched over he went against me hitting me full force, ramming his shoulder into my stomach. I was glad I hadn't eaten recently for I surely wouldn't have been able to hold it in.

Suddenly I heard a yelp from somewhere behind me. "Jerry, help!"

My guy - Jerry - didn't even bother to answer his as I backed him to the wall, thrusting my forearm under his chin. He grunted and tried to push me away, but I wasn't moving. Well, until he unexpectedly pulled me against him that was. It took me off balance and I stumbled forward as Jerry pulled free of my grasp. Before I could recover, he grabbed the back of my head and closed the distance between my forehead and the wall. Ouch.

Dazed, I stumbled back, holding a hand to my head. Without missing a beat, Jerry extended his foot into my chest and I almost flew back onto the street. I hesitated for a moment watching the stars flying around my head, when I noticed a hole in my suit pants.

"I've paid a fortune for that suit," I snarled in anger, causing everybody around me to stop in amazement. "Now I'll have to take it back to the tailor's again."

Jerry sized me up and then snickered, apparently deciding that despite being furious my clothes were ruined, I still wasn’t a threat.

I heard Saul exhale a surprised puff of air as his opponent took a swing at his solar plexus, but I wasn't given the opportunity to watch as Saul kneeled on the ground in pain, because Jerry decided to give me another lesson. He grabbed me by the lapels and lifted me off the ground and into the air.

"I wasn't joking about the suit," I gasped, gripping his wrists to help support my weight. "You owe me enough already." With that said, I slapped my hands against the sides of his head, my open palms slamming against his ears.

He cried out in pain and dropped me in order to claw at his ringing ears. I looked over to where Saul was grunting, but he seemed to have everything under control – more or less. I was just about to turn back and attend to Jerry, when the man in question delivered a firm punch to my diaphragm. I gasped and staggered back - honestly, the guy didn’t give up.

I saw Jerry move forward to strike again, so I ducked and then aimed a very nice uppercut at his jaw. He leaned back to avoid the hit, but my knuckles still managed to scrape his chin. Then I aimed for his exposed neck, thinking of finally finishing him, but I didn't expect what came next. He reacted to my attempt by jabbing his fingers into my ribs with so much power that I heard something crack inside.

I fell to the ground clutching at my side, breathing heavily.

I heard Saul call my name, but I couldn't move. I felt like there was a hole in my ribcage - and maybe there was. It took me about half of a minute to open my eyes again, inspecting my surroundings. Saul was pressed against the wall by the throat, grunting. "Archie!" he hissed and nodded towards my gorilla.

Jerry was standing with his back towards us, hunched over his knocked out friend. There laid my opportunity. I wasn't capable of standing up, so I couldn't really rise to the occasion, but I decided that I could slide over to it. And that's exactly what I did.

I have no idea how I managed to get behind him behind Jerry hearing me, but when I did, I knew the luck was on my side. The bloke was leaning forward which couldn't have been very stable. I took him by his ankles jerking his feet towards me with all the force I had. I heard Jerry yelp and then came a loud thud as his head came into contact with the wall in front of him. It was a harsh blow and it was no surprise it knocked Jerry unconscious. I think I even heard his skull crack, but I couldn’t be sure.

I must've blacked out again, because when I opened my eyes a little later, our enemies were all tied up in a nice bundle and Saul was poking my cheek. "You alright?" he asked trying to hide his concern.

I nodded and sat up. "Have you called Wolfe?"

He shook his head. "Not yet. Wanted to check on you first."

"Do it now," I rasped, standing up on unsteady feet and slowly heading to retreat my revolver from where I had thrown it earlier. I wasn’t looking forward to the hospital visit I knew I would have to go through once I got out of here. Bloody thugs.


End file.
